The sound of a newborn baby crying can feel overwhelming to new parents. Somehow grandparents think it is cute and know precisely what to do with newborn crying. To new parents it can feel like they are not doing something right and are at a loss for what to do about the crying when nothing seems to be working. I know because I have been there myself. With my first born crying was a consistent nighttime routine. At a certain point he would just start crying and nothing that I did seemed to have helped. This is when I began to research and Google.
Does that sound like you right now?
So what should you do when everyone’s advice is so different?
Try everything.
Most exhausted parent will try anything and everything. That is the main point here. Trying everything and seeing what works for you and your baby at the moment that you are in.
Most of the time crying can be soothed by the following:
• Soothing sounds
• Soothing touches
• Soothing motions
Smoothing Sounds
Some information out there is that sound machines are the way to go with deep baby
sleep and a way to sooth your baby because it reminds them of the womb. This is true for some babies but sometimes it is not. If you have a baby that is sensitive to sounds and gets stimulated instead of relaxed then they will keep crying. You can try to use a sound machine to see if it works for you but before you make a purchase on one that you can use consistently, there are a lot of YouTube sounds out there that run about 10hrs long.
Give them a try.
Soothing Touches
Have you tried using essential oils with your baby to relax them? Is there gas trying to move through your baby and maybe a baby massage is what will soothe them? The best essential oils to use that are safe for babies are lavender and chamomile.
You can use it with a carries oil of your choice such as coconut oil or almond oil. Mix about 2-3 drops with 5ml (a teaspoon) and use it to give your baby a massage. This might be oily but their skin will absorb it. The smell of the oils mixed with massage could be very relaxing.
You can also try a bath. Yes for you and baby. Get in the bath with the baby on your chest and just relax in the water. Water is very soothing and relaxing. It is a win-win situation for both mama and baby!
Soothing Motions
This is where baby wearing and rocking come in. With our first baby, we literally tried everything. The only thing that worked for our first was us holding him and bouncing on a bounce ball to get him to relax and stop crying. He also was the car sleeper, so motion was obviously a win for him. Motions can also include baby swings and walking.
Sometimes swings can be a lifesaver for those fussy times when its right around dinner time and mama just cannot wear the baby.
I want to take a moment here and talk about the serious side of crying. First is that it is triggering. If at any moment you feel like you are loosing control with your baby, please have someone take over. YOU NEED A BREAK. At the point of anger it is really hard to step back, especially in the messiness of babies crying. Walk away. As long as your baby is not in danger, if no one is around to help you, walk away and take five DEEP breaths.
NEVER SHAKE YOUR BABY.
Second serious side is health related. If your baby has a fever or seems like there is some other health concern, please contact your pediatrician. If you have tried everything and your baby is inconsolable that is a sign for something else that is going on. Trust your mama intuition. Yes your intuition. Only you know your baby best.
Ok wheeeewwww… Got the hard stuff out.
In the end, as you can see there are some
things for you to choose from here. There is no one-size-fits-all solution. You do not have to “get it right” but do your dance with your baby and find what works for the both of you. No, you do not have to be a mommy martyr for your baby and end up never leaving them with someone because you need a break. You can only give from a place of love and that means taking care of your own needs as well.
I hope these were helpful to you on your own motherly journey. If you feel like you need some more guidance, do not hesitate to contact me, I would love to hear which one of these (if any) you used or some of your own hacks that work.
Much love,
Krystina
